I spoke with Yuri, some sort of reactor building engineer with a large brain, about the Ukrainian elections for the Prime Minister position to the Rada, the Ukrainian parliament.

1.  Where exactly were you born in the Ukraine?
Chernovtsy.

2. What is your favorite Ukrainian breakfast food?
Eggs.

3.  Why was the revolution orange?
All decent colors were already taken.

4. Do you remember any Soviet elections?
Yes. It was about coming to election booths one Sunday morning with ID, signing for a bulletin, and dropping it in a box.

5. Tell me about the parties involved in these elections?
Those elections weren't about choosing among parties but a senseless ritual. It was single party then: Communist Party.

6.  Is this a powerful position (prime minister)?
Have no idea. Probably yes, allows stealing a lot of public funds.

7.  Would you vote for Yulia Timoshenko?  Do the people find her attractive?
I don’t know anything about her. I don’t like her on photos online. I assume many find her attractive, as she has been generating so much buzz. Probably, I would find myself with minority in these elections.

8. If she were to run against Svetlana Kuznetsova, the tennis player, who would win?  What about Oksana Baiul?  Any tennis player or figure skater?
I have no idea, sorry. I think a sportswoman has no chance because she would be at disadvantage unless she is used to steroids. Winning in Ukraine requires cheating background and ability to yell a lot.

Salo. A traditional Ukrainian dish of pickled pig fat. Delectable on pumpernickel with garlic.